I cannot believe that tomorrow it will be four weeks since my darling baby girl left for a big adventure :-( Four long agonising, tortuous weeks. They have gone so fast yet so slow.
I miss her like crazy. I miss the sound of her voice, the touch of her hand, the smell of her hair. Oh how my heart aches just to hear her voice again. I think back to all those times where you get frustrated with your children and tell them to go away - boy oh boy if only. Those two words - if only - you keep saying to yourself if only I did this or if only I did that then maybe just maybe we would have our princess here with us now. It doesn't work that way though, does it. I have to keep believing that God has a bigger plan and that Emma was part of that plan. I struggle with my faith at the moment. I keep asking why? If there was really a God why would he do this to poor sweet innocent children. Why make them suffer, Why put them through so much pain and agony. I wonder if it was something that we did...... Is god punishing us by taking her away. I guess I won't even know any of these answers until I meet the big fella himself. Boy oh boy is he going to have some questions to answer!!!!!!!
I see signs, a heart shaped cloud, feathers randomly falling from the sky and beautiful blue butterflies floating around our garden. She is here with us, my only wish is that I could see her just one last time.
Emma, mumma loves you to infinity plus one xxxxxxxxxxxxxx