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Saturday, August 10, 2013

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Wowsers has it been that long? May 3rd was my last post.  I guess I don't really have much to say these days.  It is not like I have a story to tell anymore since we lost Emma.  Cannot believe that on the 15th of this month it will have been 7 months since she gained her beautiful angel wings.  7 months without hearing her voice, 7 months without seeing her gorgeous face or running my fingers through her hair as she slept.  7 months of sadness and 7 months of hell....... There have been good days where I sit back and remember some of the crazy things that she would do and say.  I am sure that she is running amok and driving everyone crazy up in heaven.

So what have I been doing these past few months?  Not a lot really.  I have started working as a Early Learning Support at the children's school and am doing my Certificate III in Education Support. It is keeping me reasonably busy.  I also work at our business (Aurora Training Institute) most other days.  I try to get in at least 2 gym sessions a week to keep this old body working.  It really does suck getting old.  You cannot seem to move as quick as you used to and it is harder to get off the floor once you actually get down there that is....... It is just another thing to keep my mind from wandering.  The busier the better.  Speaking of busy, we have the 2014 Relay for Life coming up in March which is great.  We had our first year this year and we have taken so many ideas away from it for the 2014 relay.  I have so many things going around in this head of mine (good thing there is heaps of empty space up there otherwise my skull would explode lol) Once I have more info I will tell you all about it and I will also start hitting you all up for some donations :-)  Our aim this year is to raise $5,000 for Cancer research.

Well I have saved the best for last ;-)

Have I ever mentioned that I have two pretty amazing sisters in law.... No I haven't well let me tell you.............I have the bestest :-)

Me, Sarah and Simone
Luv you guys
This last weekend was one I won't forget for a long time as on Friday I boarded a plane and flew to Sydney where I then jumped into a taxi and drove to the Novatel in Darling Harbour.  Mmmm nice I hear you say. Yep it was.  Not long after my arrival a Toyota Prado filled to the brim with excited ladies and lots of alcohol pulled up and so the party began....... I was in Sydney to see Pink with 8 other amazing women 2 of which were the bestest (remember) Friday night we went to a lovely Japanese restaurant where we experienced a divine meal. It was a weekend of firsts for some of the ladies, prawn heads and raw meat etc etc........ once we were done and dusted with our meals we promptly loaded our buts into two taxis and headed into the Cross where some of our group were longing to find a male strip club - no honest for once I wasn't one of them - I promise :-)  Alas there are no male revues in the Cross.  I am sure there would be plenty of titty bars but no dickie bars hehehehehe. We ended up in a nice place called the Bourbon bar if I am correct.  It was a kinda jazzy type of place filled to the brim with all sorts..... and I do mean all sorts

Luckily there were no hangovers Saturday morning although I really need to teach my sisters in law the art of a good sleep in.... 6.30 I believe was the time that we woke up.... I mean come on who in their right mind gets up at 6.30am.......Oh well no use complaining because if you knew these girls then you would know that you wouldn't really have a chance anyway :-) best just to go with the flow

Shit, tried my outfit on that I was supposed to wear on Saturday night and wouldn't you know it - my boobs were just too big for the shirt and were popping out everywhere lol.  What a pity - that would mean that I would have to walk into the city and shop.  Oh bugger isn't that terrible - NOT.  I love to shop and while the girls were doing other stuff I decided to slip off and go but some stuff.  Got some good bargains too and even managed to get lost.  Yep I got lost in the city and couldn't figure out how to get back to Darling Harbour.  Luckily I remembered Myer and the bumble bee.  Only the girls on our getaway would know what that means but it was how I found my was back.

Saturday night - woot woot we were off to P!nk.  We were picked up by a stretch Pink hummer and drove around the city for an hour where there was copious amounts of drinking and laughing.  Oh my what a rowdy and noisy bunch of women.  So much fun but even more to come when we got to the stadium. We were in the mosh pit..... yep an old lady like me in the Mosh pit with all the youngins'

ARGHHHH I cannot begin to describe how FANTABULOUS P!nk was live.  I don't believe that I will ever be at another concert as great as, well not unless it is another P!nk on that is.

All too soon the concert ended and so did my weekend away.  Back to reality on Sunday.  I landed and was swept off my feet by my gorgeous man.  Well he didn't actually sweep me off my feet but he was nice enough to pick me up from the airport.  I had enough time to come home and unpack and then it was off to the footy.  I can assure you all that I was in bed by 9pm on Sunday night.  I was soo tired thankfully I didn't have to go into work early Monday morning as I was still tired that day.. The older you get the longer it takes to recover from a big weekend.

Well there you have it. As I said I haven't been up to much, if you have managed to get through this post then give yourself a big pat on the back and get your self a nice glass of bubbly.

Oh and I forgot to say - HELLO NESSIE ;-)

Friday, May 3, 2013

Same old, same old

Today brings us to the 15th week anniversary since we buried our little Chicken legs (Emma).  Life seems to go on, people return to their normal activities and I often wonder why, why are you not still grieving the death of our child.  Yes it does sound selfish but as a mother of a child that has passed they are my feelings and I know for a fact, after talking to other mothers that they too felt this way. For us life will never be the same it will eventually get back to normal but it will be a new normal.

Just wanted to share this picture I took the other morning.  This is where we girls do our morning walks. So beautiful and peaceful

I feel sad when we go out and do things and Emma is not with us to enjoy it.  I know for a fact that she would have loved the trip Stuart and I did up to Rockhampton the other week.  She loved 4 wheel driving with daddy and nothing ever scared her (unlike me lol).  We had the QLD FJ Cruiser Summit which raised in excess of $3000 that was given to the QLD Cancer Council.  We had an amazing time and met some wonderful people.  We stayed at the Island View caravan park at Kinka Beach near Yeppoon and it would have to be the cleanest, tidiest caravan park that I have ever been too.  Only quite small too which made it even nicer.  The staff were so obliging and bent over backwards to make our stay the best it could be.  There were 24 FJ Cruisers there and it was just fantabulous.  We spent 3 days going here, there and everywhere and saw some beautiful parts of our state. Lots of photos to share:
Five Rock Beach - the most beautiful place

Heading to Five Rock Beach

Cannot believe he managed to stay still enough to shoot him

Day 2 outing

Nothing like a cuppa on the beach - Nicole :-)

24 Toyota FJ Cruisers all in a row

uh oh someone got a wee bit stuck

Just a bit of harmless fun

more harmless fun

and yet again more armless fun

This was a bit of a scary road to get down 

stoked that he got through one of the hazards

reflection on the beach

playing follow the leader

the places we went to were so beautiful

beautiful fresh water hole

playing with my camera but didn't have tri pod so not many turned out

Nic and Aeisha (best cook ever)

more fresh water hole

our lunch ground - so picturesque

Have been flat out trying to gather all the information to RPL my Education Support Qualification.  Phew what a mission.  It looks as though I may be able to RPL pretty much most of the Core units which will save loads of work.  That will then leave me with only6 units left to complete.  I have been loving my new position at Hillcrest The children in the year 2 class are just divine little people.  So many different personalities.  They all have one thing in common though - they all love a hug :-)

I created a layout last Friday night at a Kaisercraft scrap night.  Find it so hard to scrap these days as Emma was my main subject. When i take a photo of it I will share with you.

Mum decided to fly up and surprise me last week.  Nice having the old chook around :-)

Thats it from me.  Not alot to say really

God Bless

Leanne xxx

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Where does the time go

It seems that time is passing way too fast these days.  It also appears that the older you get the faster time goes.  I hope not as I still have way too much to do and I really don't want to get any older.

Things have been the same around here.  I sometimes wake up thinking or probably more likely - hoping that these past three months have just been a horrid nightmare but they haven't. I miss her so much.  I love nothing more that spending hours in front of the computer looking at photos of her.  This helps a little but then I get sad that I cannot reach out and touch her.  My wish is that she will come visit me and tell me that everything is ok and that she is happy and healthy where she is. Only time will tell.

Stuart and I are hoping that her headstone will be finished soon.  It is taking so long to be made.  The stone we ordered had to come from India so that has held things up by a few weeks or more.  The stone mason will then hand carve it and erect it for us.

Stuart Mishae and Jacob are doing reasonably well.  I think I am doing well because I have some lovely friends who have been through the loss of a child and know exactly what I am feeling.  I know that when I speak to them then they fully understand where it is I am coming from.  They have been an absolute godsend for me.

Our lives are slowly returning to normal although it is a new normal now.  Stuart and I find ourselves with so much time for just the two of us.  It is a bizarre feeling actually as we have always had a child that needed care etc..  Jacob is nearly 16 and is very much able to wipe his own bum now so doesn't really rely on us for much - other than the phone charge top up every month...............

Stuart and I are heading up to Rockhampton this coming Thursday for 4 nights with 25 other Toyota FJ Cruisers.  There will be about 15 from down this side of Rocky and then others are coming down from Cairns etc.... It is going to be a fun filled 5 days of 4wd and socialising.  I bought Stuart a GoPro so we are hoping to get some use out of it for this weekend.  Hopefully we do some scary driving and get some good footage.  I will be taking my camera too so I am sure I will get a few good shots to share.

I and a few girlfriends were supposed to be doing the color run this weekend but the weather was not good so they have had to reschedule.  Was so looking forward to it but now we have to wait until June.  Am hoping that they don't put it on during the June long weekend as that is my yearly getaway with the girls weekend. I can tell you now that I will not be a happy camper if that is the case.

This is only a short post tonight to say that we are still here and still managing to get through each day.  They say that it gets easier however at this point in time I have no idea how........ I am guessing the pain will always remain the same and you just learn to live with it.

On a happier note - I get to organise a baby shower......NO before you even ask it is not me........  My girlfriend Alex and her husband are having their first little bambino and I offered to organise this for her.  If you have any tips of links to great webs sites then please send them through to me.  All help greatly appreciated :-)

God Bless you

Leanne :-)

Friday, April 5, 2013

12 Weeks Today

Wow I just cannot believe that it has been 12 weeks since we laid our dear sweet baby girl to rest.  The pain is still so raw and I often wonder if it will ever ease.  Just is not right for a parent to bury their child.  So many children are still dying from this horrid disease.  Surely if we can put men on the moon - we can cure cancer................ Just don't get it........

This was our first Easter without our little princess and it was hard as this would have to have been her favourite holiday of the year.  You see, Emma was a chocolate lover from way back.  If she could have had chocolate for breakfast, lunch and dinner then she would have :-)

Stuart Jacob and I drove down to Tea Gardens/Hakes Nest to spend Easter with the family.  It was fun seeing the kids on Easter morning but also sad knowing that Emma should have been there celebrating too. The drive takes about 7 1/2 hours and let me tell you that patience has never been my virtue.  I loathe driving that far.  It probably would not have been too bad had I been allowed to actually drive but alas Stuart was having no part of that.  Humph he certainly doesn't mind me driving after he has had a few wines though........ Here are a few photos of our weekend away.  We are lucky enough that the family own a large outdoor adventure camp The Great Aussie Bush Camp.  We had loads of fun on the new high ropes course, archery and of course the humungous new flying fox.  Don't think it is as big as the other one they have but still fun.
My sister in laws and I were supposed to go horse riding on the Saturday.  Wow what a fizzer that was.
We headed out to Bulga Creek all excited and ready for an hours ride only to arrive there and not see a horse in sight.  The young lady asked us if we had seen the horses when we drove in and we said no.  We can't find them she says.....  She told us to get ready and put our helmets on.  OMG the helmets were disgusting and full of ants and spiders.......I refused to wear one so she gave me hers.  We asked why she was't going to be wearing one and she said that there were not enough horses as all but 4 were lame..and that she was just going to walk the horses.  Yeah right why would I want to be led around fro an hour when I was expecting a proper this stage we had been waiting 20 minutes.  At this point we were discussing amongst ourselves if we should just go get our money back and go home.  Horses still had not been found or saddled.  Enough was enough so we ended up getting a refund and headed home - all a little sad that we didn't get our ride but certainly happy to be out of that place.  There was one poor horse there that looked like it needed a good feed.  Felt so sorry for it.  So Warning to all those who are thinking of heading to Bulga Creek to go horse riding - DON"T DO IT........

My gorgeous Nephew, Tyler

Stuart on the High Ropes course at our camp

Sarah and Cooper enjoying the high ropes course

Matthew on the final part of the course, the flying fox

Jacob and his nanny

my handsome man xxx

Stuart threw me over his shoulder and I still had hold of my camera :-)

Cooper giving me his serious look

Cooper in the back ground with his boogey board

My little Jack Jack, so adorable for a three year old

Jack Jack again playing with his bubbles

Little Finlay enjoying the pippies that the big boys caught

My spunky sister in law (Sarah)

Spent the day here on the beach, absolute perfection.  Gotta love Australia

Matthew harnessing up for the big flying fox

We are so very blessed to have such a beautiful close knit family.

I have started studying my Certificate IV in Education Support and have been lucky enough to get  part time work at Hillcrest Christian College.  I am going to be learning support helper for a child with speech learning difficulties.  Am so excited that I have been given this opportunity.  The study is going to be difficult but I want this so bad so I will get it done.

If you have made it to the end of this post then HOORAY as it seems like a bit of a long one.   Would love to share some creative stuff but just haven't had the urge to do anything these past few months.  Sneaky little Miss Em must have taken my mojo with her......  Just like her to do something like that :-)

My dear friend Alex has her induction at her Church this weekend.  She is now the Youth Pastor at Church of Christ Burleigh Heads and will be preaching this Sunday.  Well Done Alex :-)

Leanne Love :-)

Life your life to the fullest and have no regrets - life is far too short

Monday, March 25, 2013

Not alot

It seems like ages since I have done anything at all crafty but lately I just haven't really wanted to.  It seems so trivial and a little silly sometimes.  I did however attend a class with my girlfriend Val last weekend in Brisbane.  We had classes booked with Finnibair.  An amazing artist as you can see if you visit her blog.  I missed Saturdays class but did the journal cover class on Sunday.  Wowsers what a brilliant class.  I loved my final product although I did grumble a lot whilst making it that it just didn't look right.  It all came together in the end though.

So this is the front of the journal.  Didn't get the back done - oopsies although It really doesn't bother me that it isn't done. I don't usually grab my journals and read from the back first anyway :-)

As I said I missed the Saturday as one of my oldest friends got married.  The weather was perfect as was everything else.  The bride and groom looked so fantastic and were so made for each other.  I am so happy that Kim has finally found the happiness that she has longed to find.  

I also have some beautiful news to share but cannot share it quite yet.  I will tell you all as soon as I am able.  It is exciting, well I think so anyway.

Oh joy of joys I forgot to tell everyone......... I got a part time position at Hillcrest Christian College as a learning support aide for a student in primary school that needs a little help. I will begin after the Easter holidays.  I will also be doing my prac with the little preppies.  How exciting is that going to be.  I love the littlies, they are just so sweet and innocent and come out with the funniest things sometimes.

Anyway I really should be reading my text book or something a little more productive.  

I wish all my readers a joyous Easter and remember guys the season is not about the rabbit and the eggs (although the eggs are pretty yummy) It is about so much more :-)

God Bless